Ok – let’s go ahead and establish this from the top –
I AM A HATER
cool?……cool – now that we have that out of the way I can give you my reason for why he will ruin the Super Bowl, and what I think should happen to save it.
Bruno is the epitome of the metro-male…that has no place on the gridiron – what needs to happen is Iron Maiden and Wu Tang should come out and do a set together…but instead we’ll have a very tanned little mermaid crooning at half-time while I’m trying to drown myself in Natty Ice to make sure I’m not coherent enough to hear him whine. The Super bowl is the epitome of raw steak and bloody knuckles…where men, manly women and awesome women that love football come together for the love of the sport – a sport that’s laced with hard hits, high adrenaline and speed. Bruno will serve as the “cold shower” of the football feel.
I submit that we convince Richard Sherman to run out – snatch the mic from Mr. Mars and do his rendition of “Slam” by ONYX – it’s a song that fits his …….vibe. If this doesn’t not happen, then the entire super bowl might be ruined – if the players hear his voice…they might want to hang their helmets in the locker and come out on the field and either twerk or play a game of twister.